Twinning Whispers

 Deliberately Thoughtless…

I was not born alone upon this earth. Fate, with a wicked sense of humour, gifted me a twin, Laziness. From the very first lullaby, we were partners in crime. I gurgled, she yawned. I tried crawling. She suggested, “Why not just roll?” Together we perfected the noble science of sitting still. We carried with us the noble art of postponement as our family legacy. We grew up hand in hand.

Years passed. When I got married, my poor unsuspecting husband thought he was getting one perfect bride. But alas! Destiny handed him a two-in-one offer. In front of the the ageless flame that bears witness to vows, my sly twin also tied her invisible knot. Along with me, he was compelled to welcome my twin into the household. And believe me, she came with no dowry, only endless naps and a talent for creative excuses. 

From that day on, she became the invisible third member of our marriage. She ruled our house. Whatever I attempted to do, be it cooking, cleaning, or even deciding whether to water the plants, I would turn to her for advice.

“Should I cook?”, I would ask. “The stove looks tired; let it rest.”, would be her reply. “Should I clean?”, I would whisper. “Dust is but history settling peacefully. Why disturb it?”, she would whisper back. Even when I thought of waking up early, she would drape me in the golden chains of sleep, declaring, “The sunrise can manage without you.” Cooking shall be optional. Dust shall be viewed as vintage decor, and naps shall be observed thrice daily.

Her opinion for all my questions will always be the same. “Why hurry? Tomorrow is standing right there, waiting patiently!”

In every battle of life, my twin fights by my side. While my husband wrestles with deadlines, I and my twin float like queens on a cloud of procrastination. He would always shake his head at the two-for-one bride deal destiny handed him. Thus, our household is a kingdom where Laziness reigns supreme, and I, her eternal accomplice, remain loyal to her throne, declaring to the world: “Procrastinators unite… tomorrow!”

Isn’t life too short to rush? Why today, when tomorrow still exists?

So here we are again, my twin and I, celebrating the birthday of that valiant soul who shares our kingdom. The man who, with saintly patience, endures not one bride but two. Me and my ever-drowsy shadow. As the day tiptoes toward night, let this belated wish rise like incense before the weary gods. Happy birthday, my brave companion. May you be blessed with endless strength to tolerate your two-for-one destiny, a wife who dreams more than she dusts, and her twin who naps through it all.