Love....Uff! The oft repeated topic..

The other day my friend was telling me she was head over heels in love with someone which made me sit and really think.. Why is it that we always talk about Love? We want to love, and be loved.. and also to fall 'in' love too!

I had loved my dad. He was, for me, a Santaclaus. He used to visit me every year with lots of gifts. But he was never there for me when I had needed him. He was never there to take any major decisions in my life. He was never a friend, and used to throw his weight around. For him, love was something which you hide inside your heart. So is my mom. Her love was and is always kept under the wrap. She was always sceptical. I always used to keep to myself. Hmm.. that was always better. In my leafing out.. my likes, my ambitions.. all I swept under the carpet. I never took it out and dusted. Maybe these things toughened me up a lot. Still I love her.

They brought a man in front of me. He is your husband, you should love him. OK, I will.. and I did.. and I do. Then it was the turn of two cute alsaetians. Oh I love them too! My own darlings, the products of our love. How I love them..! Even when they fight tooth and nail, even when they cheat me by reading comics inside their textbooks, even when they make me get ready to reserve a bed in the nearest asylum...

I was never given an oppurtunity to choose.. There was no option. No waiting for love to happen and blossom. I could never experience what it was like to choose to love someone. (Oh no.. I am not that touch-and-feel type who is blinded by Mills and Boons and Harlequins. But somewhere deep inside me, sleeps a hardcore romantic.) The Sinatra and Lionel Richie I was devouring made me realise that I have never fallen 'in' love. The soft melodies and the raindrops forced me to go out and look out for someone to sweep me of my feet and steal my heart.

And the quest began! For someone to come in his bike and take me out to wilderness ...

-

Parting shot:

"Love is sometimes denied, sometimes lost, sometimes unrecognised....

But in the end, always found with no regrets, forever valued and kept treasured"

- Anonymous

An anonymous whisper...

The fun I used to have in my teens were really marvellous. If anyone had thought since I was an only child with a single parent, studying in a women's college, my life would have been drab, then they are in for a surprise!

We.. me and my inseparable friend, (then and now too), always find ways to keep ourselves amused. There were those long phone calls made late night (after everyone started to snore so that we can update our informations and GKs about locals) interrupted by a telephone operator whose main hobby during his night shift was to eavesdrop our tete a tete. He later said he always accepted his colleague's night shifts too so that he also would be kept updated. We were completely unaware of this third party intruding in our gosspis till one day when we were out of topic and was just idlying in petty matters, a voice suddenly said "Comeon girls, today you are sooooo boring.."! We both still dont know how we survided that moment.. cold and paralysed with fear and embarrasment, we couldnt find our voice even to ask who that person was! To make the matters worse, we were so startled to hear a stranger that the phones and the stands all tumbled down, making the snoring parents wake up and catch us redhanded.

The next day when we called, we were holding our breath! And then the voice came, saying that we kept him company in his otherwise boring job. He was a telephone operator in our telephone exchange. We were unsure of what to do. We had decided not to disclose ourselves. But he gave us our own history and geography word by word. He even knew the names of the boys we were eyeing. He used to sing songs for us, there were comments for each of our sentence, and a solution for the problems. We could know who all were calling whom. He could keep track of everyone's telehone calls, and we were reported immediately if someone we had eyes on had called and flirted with someone else. We were notified when our parents talked behind us. And most important, our phones were never out of order. Complaints were immediately taken care of without being asked.

It was like that for almost two years.. Our telephone became a living thing. It had a voice. It had life. And it had Power too. Then one day he got transferred. He had to go from our exchange. Even after going to another place, he used to contact us.. Sometimes, in the middle of our talk, a song used to weave its way to our ears.. Then slowly, he disappeared from our life.. Even now, we used to think about him.. our anonymous telephone operator.

My Union with 'ME'!

I and 'ME'

Inseparable.. in a rhythm

Swaying to the music of the silence

Reveling in the unseen beauty

Singing the unsung songs

Wandering in the never trodden paths

Hand in hand,

Soul in soul,

Heart in heart,

I walked with my 'ME'!

How sweet the harmony we are in now!

When time become timeless

And we become ageless…

A life of minds

Of equality and mutuality

As winged souls flying to infinity together

All lights and music

Ecstasy and rapture

I and my 'ME'! ! !

A cup of tea

My first sip of tea in the morning is a truly good moment. I like to be alone, curled up in my favourite corner of the sofa, in the silence of my own solitude, with a steaming cup of tea in my left hand, and a Britannia Marie in my right. I let the steam rise and mist my face as I breathe it in and I let my mind wander, and settle into a deeply contemplative mode.

There used to be a doubt as to how long one should dunk the biscuit in the tea to get that perfect taste. I started from twenty seconds. By the time I completed counting 10, the biscuit disappeared. So I tried 8. No.. too messy. Cant take it out from the cup. 5 seconds is ok, but then it didnt taste like biscuit. So I settled on 3.. I took the biscuit, dipped it in my tea, and counted one, two, three.. and out. Well, it was not that perfect. Okie dokie, try again.. Now I counted one thousand, two thousand, three thousand.. and out! YES.. this is the perfect time needed to dip a biscuit in the tea to get that perfect taste and limpness. It just melts in your mouth. Yummmmyy...!!

Valentine Whispers

I like Valentine's day. I like any other days too for that matter, when I dont have to cook ... God bless St.Valentine, and all those Archies and Jugheads (or is it Hallmarks?) who make all these days to sell their products... and who try hard to empty our purse too. There is a Valentine's day, a Woman's day, a Mother's day, .. all those days I simply love! In thy name.. I refuse to enter the kitchen! I still dont understand why there is a Woman's day. Isn't every day our day? ;)

Thoughtless whispers.....

My scars are deep. But I never weep. My spirits heal fast. I turn my life around my fingers. Whatever happens, I twist it to suit my way.

I dont have much sad memories of my life.(Not incidents, but memories). I cherish only the happy ones. I prioritise my priorities. I make compartments. In one I dump all the unhappy incidents, and keep it tightly closed. Occasionally I empty the bin. In one, I stack my happy memories. Once in a while, I take each one out, and polish it, and keep it back.

This is Me... Dont be surprised if you get an occasional whisper from me. Let me.. I have made the whisper deliberately thoughtless.. Sounds nice, doesn't it?